A person that I know and that knows me really well recently told me “you don’t like much”. Their words stung, I mean really stung. They stung because I didn’t want it to be true. To me, a Blackman that doesn’t “like much” is only looking forward to a difficult life. But as I let my feelings come to the surface I had to accept her words but also define them. For me, not liking much has made me very tenacious about what I do like. It has made me pursue options were none appeared to exist. My mother once told me “if someone tells you no your talking to the wrong person.” This beliefe has served me well in academia. Inside academia I have been subtly told that I couldn’t go down certain roads. This was mainly due to my grade point average out of high school and later undergrad. What is so crazy, as I look back, is how no one every really explained to me the importance of grades and how bad ones have a tendency to follow you. To me and many of my college bound friends, getting a “C” grade was fine because it was passing. Sadly it wasn’t until graduate school that I grasped the whole concept-and it starts as early as junior high school. Follow me: 1) the math you take in elementary school impacts that math you take in junior high, that math sets the math you take in High school. Now if you haven’t hit a high enough math level by your senior year e.g. pre calculus, some colleges won’t even consider your application. Which leaves many uninformed minorities heading to community college and out of consideration for many Ivy League schools and in
Now this is where being tenacious has helped me. I spent several years in community colleges learning the ropes. Then I went to the first college that would look at me and my low grade point average. From there I went on to graduate school. Now to type all of that in one sentence makes its sound so simple. IT WASN’T! During undergrad I had to learn how to get my work done on what is called the quarter system. The quarter system is a course system that last 10 weeks instead of the traditional 18 week semester system. The quarter system moves fast and it can become sink or swim. Fortunately I swam, or shall I say at first-dog paddled. To share another moment that was a learning experience for me, I received a letter after my first quarter at school informing me that I was on the deans list. Now for me being on any list had only meant trouble. In this case it was a good thing. The Deans list was referring to my high grade point average from the previous grading period. I share that story to emphasis how we minorities are excluded from certain capital, social capital. Social capital being information that is exchanged among friends, family and those within certain institutions.
One of the things I learned through my social capital is that to get into graduate school you have to apply a year in advance. Again this was one of those things that I had no idea what the protocol was. Being tenacious made me apply to over 21 graduate schools and deal with stomaching over 20 rejection letters. The myth I grew up with was that only the smartest kids go to college and get those fancy letters behind their name. The reality is that anyone with drive and focus can get through school. Second, many of the smart people that I went to high school with have crumbled under the pressure.
I was recently reading this book called The Millionaire Mind –it’s funny how people without money are always reading books about people that have it- but this one I actually purchased for $2.50 at the thrift store. This book has some really good points, one of the main ones being that most millionaires didn’t get to were they are because of good grades, they made it due to their social skills and their ability to stay self motivated even in the face of doubt.
I share these stories because as a Blackman in
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